"Society makes girls and women more vulnerable to self-criticism," psychotherapist and career counselor Dr. Jacqueline Hornor Plumez writes in The Bitch in Your Head. Plumez refers to the often pervasive, interior female voice of disapproval that preys upon secret vulnerabilities--even in seemingly successful and confident women--as "The Bitch." This destructive, demoralizing force is behind accusatory self-talk and insults like, You look fat.... Why didn't you...? How could you say that...? You're a horrible person/mother/wife/friend. Plumez demonstrates that "naming and 'externalizing' a problem makes it easier to recognize and fight." By examining "The Bitch" as a syndrome of sabotage, the author makes an informative and compelling case that identifies why women beat themselves up, and often feel inferior and unworthy to the point they fear losing love, health and approval.
According to Plumez, "The Bitch" takes many forms. It can permeate all aspects of life, starting in childhood and reappearing at pivotal moments, from dating to marriage and divorce, parenting and work, and even in the golden years. It has the capacity to interfere with sleep, diminish productivity and exacerbate self-defeating tendencies, guilt, depression and phobias. Over the course of 16 thought-provoking chapters, detailed case studies reveal stories of women trying to combat and keep "The Bitch" at bay. Plumez's strategies, tools and techniques transform this negative inner voice from insulting and demeaning to encouraging and empowering, which can, in turn, improve a woman's quality of life. --Kathleen Gerard, blogger at Reading Between the Lines