Knowing a person all their life doesn't guarantee an understanding of all the secrets or fears harbored in their heart, as Julia Dahl (Invisible City) explores in her superb character-driven psychological thriller I Dreamed of Falling.
Ashley Lillian and Roman Grady have been in love since they were 13 years old. They've "proved everyone wrong," surviving chaotic childhoods, Ashley's history of drug use, and "when Ashley came out as bisexual and they opened the relationship." Their challenges increased when Ashley experienced postpartum depression following the birth of their son, Mason, who is now four years old. Money is tight: Roman is the only reporter at the newspaper in their tiny Hudson River Valley town of Adamsville, N.Y., and Ashley teaches yoga. The couple lives with Roman's controlling mother, Tara, who assumes most of the responsibility for Mason's care, and Tara's fiancé, John. Ashley's secrets tumble out when her body is found on the cliffside below the home of her former lover, a bag of pills in her pocket. At first, the police suspect Ashley's death is due to an accidental overdose. Roman wonders if Ashley returned to drugs, unable to "win against the sadness in her brain." But the evidence soon points to murder.
Dahl skillfully elevates the suspense while deploying Adamsville's economic decline as a metaphor for her characters' ennui about the smallness of their lives. Roman believes that "without Ash they were a tiny fraction of what they'd been." Meanwhile, although Tara neglected Roman as a child, her obsessiveness about Mason's well-being strains the household.
Grief, guilt, and an uncertain future punctuate the emotional I Dreamed of Falling. --Oline H. Cogdill, freelance reviewer