Nanaville: Adventures in Grandparenting

Welcome to Nanaville, Anna Quindlen's newest address. The prolific chronicler of American family life--in columns, nonfiction (Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake) and novels (Alternate Side)--shares her latest chapter: grandparenting. "I am the mayor of Nanaville, and I vow to carry out my duties well," Quindlen declares in this joyous memoir when her son's son is born.

Two tropes she debunks are that the grandparent and child have a "common enemy" and that spoiling is her role, "which casts Nana not as the bad cop and not even as the good cop but as the getaway driver." Baby Arthur is born into a loving extended family, there's no doubt. Quindlen writes warmly about her son, who "puts his own concerns and needs aside to minister to this little boy" and her daughter-in-law who replied, "Of course," when she first asked to hold the child, "signaling right at the start where I stood." She recognizes her role does not include giving unsolicited advice. The "two commandments of Nanaville: love the grandchildren and hold your tongue."

Describing her large Irish Italian family (her grandparents had 32 grandchildren!), Quindlen reflects on cultural changes. When she was a girl, a "mixed marriage" was between a Catholic and a Lutheran. She cheers "the arc of progress" Arthur represents; his mother is Chinese, and his grandparents eagerly study Mandarin to talk with him in both of his languages.

Thoughtful and often hilarious (including variations on the title "grandma"), Nanaville is a delight for women of any generation. --Cheryl Krocker McKeon, manager, Book Passage, San Francisco

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